The date is set, the venue booked, invitations are out, the stag weekend in the diary. Just the small matter of a speech to write. All my wedding speech writing advice applies, but here are ten more tips to ensure that you write a really outstanding and original groom speech:
Keep your groom speech original
It’s fine to include the odd predictable line (‘my wife and I’ for instance), but don’t go overboard or your groom speech will sound like an internet cut and paste. It’s better to sacrifice humour for originality than the other way round.
Thank your new in-laws
Your bride might not get (or want) the opportunity to give a speech and thank them publically for all they’ve done for her, so it’s up to you to do it on her behalf – and they’ll love you for it.
Mention your own parents
And not just for contributing the flowers. Looking back over decades of parenting, it is unlikely that their contribution to the wedding is actually their finest moment. Thank them for lifts to school when you were ten, freezing afternoons on the side of a muddy sports field watching you make a fool of yourself, or for helping you learn to drive; anything that demonstrates the love and support they have provided for so long. Unless they haven’t.
Don’t forget this isn’t a best man speech
It isn’t an opportunity for a ten minute comedy stand up routine, so try to balance your hilarious one-liners with a good dollop of sincerity. What is it about your wife that you love? How has your life changed (for the better!) since she’s been in it? Which of your bad habits does she have to put up with? Most importantly, make your guests feel that they have sacrificed an entire day of their lives (with all the associated costs) for a good reason.
Your wife is more important your best man
Although it’s nice to introduce your Best Man at the end of your speech, remember that your wedding day is about your relationship with your Bride not your best mate. I jest not. We receive countless drafts by email where the bride appears to be no more than an excuse to have had a stag do.
She’s your ‘wife’ so feel free to mention it in your groom speech!
Nothing gets more of heart-warming cheer than the line “my wife and I…”. Yes it’s predicable and a little bit cheesy, but the novelty of hearing it for the first time never fails to please a wedding crowd. And that cheer will relax a nervous speaker no end.
Mention how she looks
Beautiful, gorgeous, stunning …. however you chose to say it, make sure you remark on her appearance. This is a once in a life time opportunity to tell your wife in front of a large collection of your friends and family that you fancy her. Unless you don’t. And even then, this is your groom speech and probably the one time in your life that it’s worth lying through your teeth.
Leave out the ex-girlfriends
However ‘relaxed’ your wife is about your past, there’s a time and a place for referencing the exes and the Groom speech isn’t one of them. I’m a big believer in a speech ‘riskometer’ where anything that could cause offence to anyone is edited out at source.
Talk to her
The more sincere elements of your speech may be far more powerful and personal if, when you’re talking about your wife, you actually look at and make eye contact with her. And address her as ‘you’ rather than ‘she’.
Liaise with her Dad
Assuming he is speaking before you, it’s worth checking that you are not going to be duplicating too many thanks or anecdotes about your bride, how you met, or the proposal. For example, if guests have travelled a long way, it’s important to mention them, but you don’t both have to list them all.
Writing your groom speech for you
I hope you find these tips useful. We write groom speeches for clients around the world. We can read your first draft and make suggestions on how to improve it, or write it for you from scratch. Here’s how we can write it for you!