A wonderful email sent from a thoughtful bride to her fiancé, suggesting just what he should and shouldn’t say in his groom speech on the big day. Thanks for forwarding HP.
I know you said not to worry, but I’ve noticed that on our wedding spread sheet, the box marked ‘Snugglepuss’ Speech’ is conspicuously un-ticked. Perhaps you think you can wing it – well, Mark thought so too, and remember what happened next? Claire seems very happy with Paulo these days.
I’m sure you do already know this, but just in case, there are a few key things to remember in your groom speech. I’m sure you won’t need reminding. But… well, it couldn’t do any harm.
Now I know you think the groom’s speech is just a load of ‘thank you so muches’, but you don’t have to mention every caterer, waiter, cake-maker, photographer, party adviser, patient friend, teacher, tutor, taxi driver, paramedic and postman who has ever helped you since we first met.
Just focus on the most important people on the day – close family and those who have travelled far or defeated death to get there. Everyone else can be covered with a thank you to the room at large for joining us. Honestly, that will cover it.
Of course, you really should say something nice (and appropriate) about my bridesmaids. They have been an endless source of support to me, and will fully deserve some recognition. And a toast. But don’t mention Susan’s boobs (again) and remember who the real focus of your speech should be.
And it’s not Diego Costa, Bear Grills or your mate Sascha from Brighton.
It’s me. And before you go into too much detail, remember the audience; my gran would rather hear that we met one warm and starry summer night in the Mediterranean than at 3am in a bar in Magaluf after sixteen shots of tequila.
And be relevant. Think about what the audience want to hear. Make them feel its been worth the effort, the journey and the hangover to be with us. Tell them why we chose one another, why we work together, and what it means to you for us to be marrying. Do feel free to flatter me (though not too much) and spare a little for my parents too – no harm in scoring a few extra points!
This is your big chance to say something heartfelt and personal in front of our friends and family, so please don’t use any stock gags copied and pasted off the interweb – I know what you said before, but you did not coin that line about the cake being in tiers (neither, for that matter, did Mark). Or Sascha. Brief stories about the two of us (tasteful ones, if you can think of any) will make it so much more unique, personal, and amusing. But please avoid the one about the chocolate sauce fiasco in Aunty Betty’s spare room.
If nothing else, remember – this is our big day; our chance to show everyone just how much fun and love there is in our relationship. Everyone there will be wishing us well – just let them know it’s appreciated. Keep it warm, keep it light, get some laughs in (on the right side of appropriate) and finish with a toast! (And of course, make sure my glass is always full).
And if that’s too much to remember, then don’t worry; dial 020 8245 8999 and ask the guys at Great Speech Writing to help you.
Love from your Hugglepuss
P.S. – Claire has asked me to make sure she and Paulo are on a separate table to Mark. Can we sit him with your uncle? I don’t think we want him too near the bridesmaids. And experience suggests you better warn the waiters about Sascha.